Path to peace of mind

UNDERSTANDING THAT JUDGING AND GETTING JUDGED HOLD NO VALUE. One of the hardest things in life is ruminating and getting hurt about what other people think about you and your life.

Know and reiterate the following things to yourself. 

• That those people know your name, but not your story
• That they have heard what you have done, but don't know what you have been through.
• That it is merely their perception about you and they haven't lived your life for you.
• That it is unfair for them to read page 754 of your book called life and thinking that they know you completely. So don't give much attention to their misconceptions.
• By believing, "If they were in your shoes living your life, they would fall in their first step" and staying strong.

People judge. People hurt. People leave. You need to be stronger and sometimes you need to get hurt real bad to understand life and you will mature. To live is to experience all the emotions. Pinnacle of happiness and the nadir of sadness. Sometimes people just are eager what happens in your life, they DON'T CARE. Not everyone has the same mentality as you and not everyone you truly care about, cares about you. You know who really cares at your worst times.

Top Ten Things One should experience in Life

• Love Selflessly and Unconditionally

Love someone so selflessly and unconditionally without any expectations. That is the purest form of love. Love truly, be there for them, care for them, get hurt for them but still love them more. It is the most fulfilling emotion that you can ever experience. It is once in a lifetime experience. Future relationships may exist, but still not as good as the selfless first love. If it stays forever, cherish it.

• Talk to people to understand them, not just listen

Deep conversations with the ones you love and care for gives you peace and it indeed is so soul relaxing. Always talk to others to understand and not just listen. Always maintain eye contact with the person. That means you care for them and are really listening to them. PHONE CALL and TEXT CAN WAIT.

• Perform on Stage

Music, Dance, Standup comedy or whatever. Entertain people and see the fun in them. Be a reason for someone to smile. Make others happy whenever you can and make their day.

• Go on a road trip without any plan and make crazy plans on the go

Go somewhere without a solid plan, with your loved one. Take pictures, hike, go to a random lake, some random beach, some random sunset place, and make memories. Life is all about these pleasant memories. Do what you like for a weekend.

• Experience a broken heart

It teaches you a lot of things in life. It shows you your real friends. It teaches you some important life lessons and it teaches you to love yourself. If it is meant to be it will be. Wait patiently for your love.

• Develop a new hobby

If you had never read a book, start reading. Develop new hobbies. Sketching, Rock Climbing, Singing and Dancing And So On.

• Stop ruminating over what others think about you

It is just their perception, not your character. They just know your story, not what you have been through. Stop giving them so much importance.

• Forgiving those who hurt you

This takes a lot of energy and a lot of wisdom. Forgiveness takes a lot from your side. But you forgive them because you are kind and mature.

• Fail and fail miserably and have an emotional breakdown

Fail in something, in your love, job, etc. and fail miserably. Not everything comes so easily and life is not a cake walk. You have to experience failure so that you can get the real meaning of success. Cry it out. As hard as you can. Have an emotional breakdown after a hard failure, heartbreak and vent it out. Experience the nadir of sadness atleast once in lifetime.

• Understanding yourself

This is the most difficult part in our entire life. We keep learning about ourselves every once in a while.

A-Z Feelings

Almost there. But not quite there.

• That Almost feeling is worse
• He almost finished first in the race.
• The baby was almost saved.
• That feeling is always worse

But.

• The Word But gives you that worse feeling.
• "I love you,but.." when you get this response from the person who is your life and to whom you confessed "But, I love you". The position of the word but indeed gives a worse feeling
• On a funnier note, Thank you Mario. But the princess is in another castle :) Can relate the feeling? :P

Comparison.

• Being compared with someone on a faulty basis, irrespective of the situation or circumstances one has gone through. That feeling is worse.

Death

• Death of someone who is so close to your heart
• Even the separation of someone who you love the most will cause you intense emotional pain and numb feeling.
• The dead ones will never return and so you move on with life after a few months or years. But the ones alive and separated will give you more pain.

Emotional Pain

• Physical pain, unlike emotional pain heals very quickly. Emotional pain will subside but the scars still remain.

Feeling of remorse.

Guilt

• The most underrated feeling

Heartbreak

• First love and first heartbreak is terrible
• Second heartbreak is a terrible feeling too because you will get it from your first love. The time when you want things to be normal and apologize for saving the relationship and get ignored. There may be faults on either sides but feeling ignored by the person you love the most is the most worst feeling ever.

Indifference

• Especially when it comes from the person who you love the most after your parents and who you treat as your life.
• The opposite of love is not hate, it is indifference

Just friends. The words that cause the most pain to some sincere love stories.

K

• When you get a simple "k" reply from the one you love after you write pages and pages explaining your feelings

Loneliness

• The time when your presence is not acknowledged and your absence is not felt is the most toughest feeling to cope up with
• Loneliness is a slow poison

Moving on and Letting Go

• Especially from the people whom you place so close to your heart

Neglected

• By the same set of people who considered you once so close

Overwhelmed.Yet another underrated feeling

Priorities

• When you get the feeling that you are not on some close one's priority list in which you once topped. Kills you from inside.

Quitting

• When you know you could have done better.

Regrets

• For the things which we could have, should have but didn't

Spoken but misunderstood is one of the worst feelings

Tears due to emotional pain

Unrequited Love. No words can explain this pain completely.

Vacuous and feeling empty.

• Due to the past experiences in life.

Worthlessness

• Especially when it comes from someone ignoring you when treat them as your life

Xtreme emotions

• Being too happy or too sad. Life has to have a balance

You once meant a lot to me

• The feeling of despair when you get to hear this and you feel ignored by those to whom you meant so much long back

Zillion more things to write and more feelings to feel to live this life completely

Life is not just about happiness and positive emotions. It is also about sadness and negative emotions. Even an amplifier needs to be given a negative feedback for it to work as an amplifier of waves or signals. Always a positive feedback turns it into an oscillator. Electronic Circuits fundae required. Such is life. You should know sadness for appreciating happiness. You should fail and learn how not to fail, then you can succeed.

  

Dear younger self,

Oh my younger self, Come here! We need to talk.

There are quite a lot of things to talk about:

• Accept that "Life is not fair. It never was and will never be" and that following your heart is harder than it seems.
• Accept that people will leave. There will be times in which even when you are present,  your presence will not be acknowledged and in your absence, your  absence will not be felt.  Learn to live with it.
• Accept that Failure is inevitable and Happens. Never  tie it to destiny. The strength of an iron chain is defined by its weakest linkage. So failure defines you. Fail and Fail Hard so that when you succeed you would have learnt how not to fail.
• Accept that Success greets you in private and failure slaps you in public.Success introduces you to the world and failure introduces the whole world to  you. When you fail, always be strong in heart. You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only option you have.
• Learn to Pretend like everything is fine. Especially when life is extremely hard on you and you have to fake like everything is normal and you aren't hurt. And the toughest part in that is smiling before others when deep down inside you know that you are deeply hurt and can't even fake a smile.
• Accept that people always be  their original self when you are of no value to them and their lives.  It  is impossible to change the character of people how much ever you  try.  Even though you can heat water, it has the property to return to  the liquid form again in sometime when allowed to be itself with no  external  stimuli. Similar is the character of the people.
• Never judge others. Sometimes we judge ourselves with our intention and others with their actions. This is unfair. Never judge anyone. You would have been looking at page 765 of their book and have a notion of them, but you never know what they have gone through earlier. So it's really unfair to judge people knowing only a part of the story. ACCEPTANCE IS THE KEY Dear.

Yours Lovingly,
Your heart